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Saturday 28 June 2014

Famous Last Words

I wrote this yesterday.


"I'm just going through the motions. I have nothing to live for. When I was low and feeling depressed, I had something to live for. Now I don't. I just can't see a way out other than to take my own life. I don't want to make a spectacular statement. I just don't want to live anymore. The best things in my life have been taken from me and no matter how much I beg I'm not getting them back. I've tried reasoning and pleading but nothing works. I wish it didn't have to be this way but I don't want to continue with the life I have left."

And then I saw this photo of my boys.


I still feel depressed, I still feel suicidal and yet...

And yet...

Wednesday 18 June 2014

Three Into One

Last week I found myself working three jobs, which came as quite a surprise to me considering that the previous month I wasn't working at all. Since moving to Devon a little while back, I'd been putting myself out there, asking for work pretty much anywhere and everywhere. At first the response wasn't all that great. Online applications were submitted, CVs were distributed and newspapers scanned for almost any type of work with little or no success.

Until...


Suddenly, about a month after my initial efforts, I was inundated with job offers. A local cafe, a private furniture shop and a high street optician all had a position for me, which is the situation I was in last week, working nine days straight for all three. Sadly, there just aren't enough days in the week and I had to hand in my notice at the cafe, which is a real shame as they're a great bunch to work with. Hopefully they won't spit in my tea next time I pop in for a drink (just kidding, they're all very friendly and professional).

So now I'm working for the opticians and the furniture shop, two completely different environments, one local and one a (reasonably) short commute away. I quite like the contrast as it doesn't feel as if I'm working a full week, even though I am. As a result of this, I'm don't dread Monday morning, looking at a long hard slog through the week and counting the days until the weekend. I should have done this years ago.

So much for Monday to Friday, nine to five.