Give Me A Sign!

Having been out of work for over a year I was a little nervous about the prospect of returning to full time employment. Fortunately for me a former employer had a part time job to offer me which I readily accepted. This gave me the chance to ease myself back into work without diving in at the deep end, plus I would be around some familiar faces. This has made my transition much easier and far more enjoyable than I could have hoped for.

The position itself is as Leaflet Distributor, which isn't very taxing nor prestigious, but it has shown me a side to society that I hadn't noticed before. I'm well aware that we are all different (I'm not*) but the varying degrees of difference has surprised me.

When I'm standing in the street most members of the public don't want to be handed a leaflet which may well turn out to be a piece of rubbish after they've seen what it is. Many people, myself included, simply turn down the offered leaflet as standard. There are, though, many ways in which it can be done. I've compiled a list of behaviours and categorised them below to help illustrate my point.

Polite:

Shake head

Raise hand

Little smile

Eye contact

No thank you

Avoid proximity (funny)

Make excuse

Have a chat

Ask what is being offered

Body language (micro expressions)

While it is pleasant for me that people walking by may actually speak to me, simply by saying "No, thanks", it isn't necessary if they would like me to leave them alone. The micro expressions tell me as much as anything else mentioned on the above list with almost no energy required or time wasted. It's not easy to put into words what this group of people do to indicate their reluctance to take what is being offered but once I've seen it, you are no longer a viable target on my radar. Remember, I'm only trying to give people what they want, not trying to offload as much as possible to carpet the pavement around me with discarded leaflets.

Also in this category are those who try to avoid me by walking behind me or placing someone or something between us to avoid my outstretched hand. They have me laughing inside every time, especially when they fail. They suddenly come across all flustered, unsure about what to do. God, I love the British public.

Forgivable:

Concentrating on something else

In a hurry

Didn't see me

Blocked line of sight

Hands full

Quite often, people will stroll past me deep in conversation with somebody, a friend or young child, or they may be texting away busily on their mobile phones, and while most of them will ignore me, it is understandable. I'm just another hazard to avoid bumping into. If they happen to be carrying shopping bags I'll leave them alone, although I regularly get asked to pop a leaflet into one of them. Of course I'll oblige. After all, that's what I'm here for. 

Rude:

Deny my existence

This category fairly makes my blood boil. I can be looking straight at someone with my arm outstretched and they walk past me, their gaze fixed firmly ahead. I know they have seen me by the way they carry themselves. It's kind of the opposite of the micro expressions mentioned earlier. They give away nothing to say they have seen me, therefore they don't need to accept the leaflet being offered. Except that their body language is all but screaming that they have seen me and they wish I would just go away. Rude. Don't forget, I only want people to take a leaflet who are interested in what is being offered. If it is indicated that someone is not interested, I will go away, or at least move my arm in a different direction.

To sum up, apart from those people who are unafraid to politely refuse me, there is a large group of people who feel uncomfortable turning me down. Why this should be, I couldn't say, but if you discover the answer please let me know.

(*Monty Python's The Life Of Brian)

The wrong signals

I was letting my mind wander recently and it occurred to me how easily people misunderstand each other. For example, many words in the English language have more than one meaning, or simply mishearing what has been said can cause confusion. Mispronouncing a word or phrase in a foreign language is easily done because it isn't the speakers mother tongue. This can create situations where two people have real difficulty understanding one another.

Now imagine being unable to hear anything at all. Deaf people use sign language to communicate but how often do they misread what everyone else is saying as we gesticulate with our hands. Some signs speak for themselves, such as hello and book.

 

But what happens when someone makes a sign without realising what they're doing, such as wiping something from the side of their mouth?

Or rubbing their nose?

This got me thinking, how often do we make signs that can be read in an entirely different way by deaf people? And what are we unintentionally saying? Personally, I have fun imagining that hundreds of metal fans, all making the horned fist, are mistakenly signing the word for reindeer or something equally inappropriate to the situation.

Well, it makes me laugh. Ho ho ho.